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What were you like in high school?I loved Missy Elliott, the Fugees, Eminem, but also 90s trip-hop. I was really into Jamiroquai, Tricky and Massive Attack. When I was 16, I wanted to be a bohemian and make it on my own [laughs]. I stole $100 out of my mom’s wallet and took the bus, nine hours, to New York City. When my mom tells the story, she always says: “I just wish you had taken more money!” I didn’t go home right away. I stayed in New York and ended up getting an internship at a magazine. My mom hired a detective. It was a whole mess [laughs].
You haven’t lived in the US full-time since 2016. How has it been watching political events unfold from afar?I came back to the US for the first lockdown to be with my family. I was a part of the first wave of protests for George Floyd, Breonna Taylor and Tony McDade. When you’re in Europe, it’s not in your face, but being back, it just feels like a constant state of PTSD. It’s horrible. I think cultural theorists have said that people in America are going to have PTSD from Trump for years. The Biden administration is far from perfect, but they’re quiet. I think people forgot what it was like when you’re focusing on your own life and the government didn’t do something every day to trigger you. Trump was a reign of terror.
You came out as HIV positive in 2015 – what do you remember of that time?When I made that decision, I made it for myself. I was so tired of living in a way that I knew was inauthentic and that was really psychologically hurting me and my health. I thought that my career was going to be over, because I had no examples of anyone ever doing that and it being a successful career move. I was filled with fear and trepidation. But where I’m at now, I realise that people have so much compassion and understanding. I also think there’s an element of people just forgetting.
Do you think the discourse around HIV has changed much since then?I would love to say that we’re in a better place, but we’re not. The discourse has continued to be positioned and geared towards the queer community, the trans community and POC. There are also hundreds of thousands of cis heterosexual people having sex without condoms. I think public health has failed a lot of society because they refuse to make the conversation universal. People view it almost now as this historical epidemic. I think there’s a lot of politics and factors [around] big pharma and money, [which is] why the public discourse around HIV has not shifted.
What do you love most about being black?There are so many powerful things that black people and black culture have given to this world. We are actively reclaiming our narratives and our own history. For the first time, we’re telling the truth, and not someone else’s version of events.
Broken Hearts & Beauty Sleep is out now on Transgressive Records
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